Archive for December, 2007

:: it wasn’t enough to You ::

December 31, 2007 Leave a comment

I will try to believe
in the things I cannot see
When I call
And you don’t come
I don’t know what I should do
Should I call?
Should I even count on you?
I’m giving all I can
It wasn’t enough
I try to understand
Was it ever enough?
I don’t understand !!

Everything you want from me
I fought so hard for everything
Everything you want from me
I tried so hard could never be
Anything you want from me
Anything you want from me
I gave it all !!


December 26, 2007 Leave a comment
With you my heart will always stay. With you my thoughts will be every day. You remain to be the one that I regret letting get away. Why didn’t I say what I needed to say? You are the one I will always use my wishes on. You are the one I will always wish was never gone. I’ll constantly wonder what went wrong. I’ll forever think of what I could’ve did that was never done.
I wish I had the guts to walk away and forget about what we had. But, I can’t because I know you won’t come after me, and I guess that’s what hurts the most….
True love? I used to believe it existed, but when you’ve had your heart torn out and thrown on the floor, you just don’t care anymore… That’s what i am now….
It hurts to see you walk away. For admit it or not, you were an important part of my life and the time we shared will forever be a part of me. So even though I realize that it was never meant to be, still, it hurts….
I hate you…and then I love you…it’s like I want to throw you off a cliff….then rush to the bottom to catch you…
I shouldn’t care or wonder where and how you are. But I can’t hide this hurt inside my broken heart. I’m fighting back emotions that I’ve never fought before, ‘cause I’m not supposed to love you anymore…
No, I can’t erase the wrong I’ve done but I hope you can give me another chance. Because if you were me, you would want the same and I’d give that chance to you…
Even if my heart should call out your name in the rain. Even if these arms should want to embrace you again. And even if I’m all cried out and no longer in pain… I’ll never fall in love that way again…
Try not to wonder about what might have been, ‘cause that was then and we have taken different roads. We can’t go back again, there’s no use giving in. And there’s no way to know, what might have been…
If you lost your love for me, you should never let it show in the first place…
Didn’t we almost have it all?
I could fill a thousand pages telling you how I felt and still you would not understand. So now I leave without a sound, except that of my heart shattering as it hits the ground….
Forgiveness is letting what was, be gone; letting what will become, what is now, be…
Being strong sometimes means being able to let go…
As you left and said your good-byes, you forgot to tell my heart how to live without you…
I made the choice to finally go because I can’t stand this pain. It’s time for my last tear to fall and me to smile again…

:: You-kNow-wHo ::

December 17, 2007 Leave a comment

i called…bt u nvr ans…i msged bt u nvr want to reply!! so wad e hell do u wan me to do?!! my fault?? y angry wif kak yani existence in my life?? i love You back then bt do u ever appreciate??!! NEVER!! im tired of loving ppl who never appreciates my love!! n i never wanna waste LOVE tat comes from my heart anymore…cz too many ppl hurt me…n i had enuff of all those ppl…including You!! when i’m ard u never appreciate…now tat i’m away fr u…u wanna quarrel wif me n find fault wif kak yani…cz,,


woRk woRk woRk!!

December 12, 2007 Leave a comment


TODAY!! was so so so tired at work…was so so so busy!! cnnt taHan man!! so much work to do…n i m so sick n tired of doing e same old thing at work…chat wif my supervisor, michelle, n kak yani…

they said this:

michelle: aiyoh work here so tiring…no tea break

kak yani: ya lor…true true true…so tired n so bored…so much work to do

me: y bother? dnt worry…be happy…

michelle: we nt like u so easy-going

kak yani: ya…ur e onli temp staff who set ur own rules…own tea-break, own breakfast time…

me: ahah!! ishh takde lah!!

michelle: ya lah!! so true…ur so daring…nxt time set up ur own company n i work wif you

kak yani: me too me too! work wif u everytime dnt worry be happy! haha!! adek angkat akak ni…happy ajek…asyik makan aje…da makin bulat tu…mcm bantal…makan ngan adek boleh gemuk ah…

me: ishh ape jek…kan da kate dnt worry be happy!! ape lagi makan lah!! HAHA!!

well…honestly,, im getting rounder n rounder…n i finish my work so fast den sometimes i so free…so eat eat eat…n kak yani layan me onli…haha!! so sweet =) she oso eat tgt wif me…she oso getting more tembam like me…see i so free i took pics of here…

back view of my beloved kak yani at work…

front view of my kak yani…

so sweet rite her smile?? gt dimple…sempat pose for me… =) love her so much!! my darling sister =)

December 10, 2007 Leave a comment

December 9, 2007 Leave a comment

ok ermmx…

didnt update 4 quite some time…cz since mon i kp falling sick…again? yeah again…till now…itz on and off…my fever…up n down…dnt feel good…didnt feel well…go doc alrdy…dragged myself there…bt still,, nt well… 😦 kp falling sick…all kinda problem wif my body!! damn!! so sick of everything…

but but but…i’m back!! n nth will pull me down!! i will live my life…to e way i wan!! n be happy!! my life i wnt let anybody hurt me…i took e whole of tiz yr to realize this,,


well i miss SUHAILA!! my bully partner!! reali miss bully-ing her…she’s e one who kp motivating me when i was so damn stress wif O level…studied wif her…n she helped me wif my MATHS…thank You my dear! loLz…miss u alot milkmilk… =) hope to see u soon…

i also miss You…bt it doesnt make any diff 2 u does it?? well,, i’m cool abt this kinda things now…like i promised…an end is an end…bt i still hope tat ur my fren though =) i do miss eating coconut jelly wif u…they sell it there at woodlands now…n it always reminded me of u… =( there’s nth else i can do bt look at it n smile on those memories… =) hoping n praying evday tat it will somehow return n come bk…

okok…tmr is MONDAY…n i haf to work…so BORING!! bt itz ok…cz kak yani is there!! i love her so so so very much!! evryday go lunch wif her…so cool…she tried to force her way everyday to treat me…bt as usual…i dnt wan =) dnt like ppl to spend $$ on me…i kp step on her foot till she need pt plasters cz her toes gt injured on fri cz of me =.-” oMg so sorry kak yani…as u can see i’m so so so CLUMSY…haha!! treat u eat ice cream tmr ok?? haha!! =)

ok…i juz ate my med…n i’m so slpy…i wanna slp now…gtg ppl!! miss all of u!! take care n see You guys ard… =) smile always =)

:: kak yani’s wedding ::

December 2, 2007 Leave a comment

today! 2nd of nov is my kak yani’s wedding day!! oMg she look so pretty!! cnt believe i went all e way 2 toa payoh 2 see her…so far!! bt she’s like my sister n she treat me like her own sister =) she love me so much so haf 2 go man!! she so pretty man i cnt gt over it!! =) bt i muz say she look better wifout make up….tats called natural beauty… =)

here’s e pic i took…bt nt so much cz later she angry i display too much…haha!!

pretty rite?? she 24 only leh…gt married so early…she was so excited lah…tat man down there look like chinese seh…hahaha!! tats her sweetheart…quite a perfect match hor…e wedding was quite grand lah…n e food was nice…she forced me take pics wif her…so take lor…later i will ask her 4 e pics…

e reception is at 1.45pm…bt i came late lor…cz SESAT cnnt find e place…kak yani noe tat i like to see e kuda kepang n hear e ppl play gamelan (dunno if i spell correctly =X) plus e kompang group tat will ngiring e groom…so she actually WAITED FOR ME!! so touching rite??!! loLz…she love me so much till she herself like postpone her own wedding ceremony 4 me!! so nice seh =) later when she come bk from honeymoon will hug hug n kiss kiss her lah to say thank u!! loLz!! i love her so much man!! last week i didnt turn up 4 kak mas wedding…i die alrdy cz when she come bk fr her honeymoon at gold coast she will kill me man…later she say i favour kak yani more than her…which is actually quite true lah…hehe =) bt i do love both of them cz they treat me like their own sister seh…esp kak yani!!